Polina is a 19-year-old fashion student, young creator, and perhaps most importantly — a girl with her own particular way of seeing the world.
Which, quite frankly, tends to make conversations significantly more interesting.
Polina finds romantic relationships to be absolutely unnecessary.
Not tragic.
Not dramatic.
Simply unnecessary.
And somehow — entirely reasonable in her own emotional architecture.
In Those Talks, Polina speaks about relationships, independence, emotional expectations, and the quiet freedom of not feeling the need to participate in something simply because everyone else seems convinced they should.
Because perhaps not everyone dreams about romance.
And maybe that is perfectly fine.
Or psychologically concerning.
Depends who you ask.
In Those Talks, Polina explains why relationships never particularly interested her — and why choosing your own version of happiness might be the most reasonable thing one can do.
UNFILTERED
“the art of me + me” — when did you realize you genuinely preferred yourself over the idea of a relationship?
POLINA
think since my teenage years. I was always thinking more about myself, what I wanted, what I was interested in, rather than boys or romantic relationships. It was never really my main focus.
UNFILTERED
Be honest: do you hate relationships, or do you hate what people think relationships are supposed to be?
POLINA
I don’t hate relationships. I just don’t like the idea of all these responsibilities you’re suddenly supposed to carry after getting into one. And also the idea that everything has to follow some scenario: first you date, then move in together, then get married, then whatever comes next. Like… who said I want any of this?
UNFILTERED
What does intimacy look like when it’s just you and yourself?
POLINA
I think it’s being comfortable alone. Knowing yourself really well. Spending time with yourself and actually enjoying it instead of constantly needing distraction. I genuinely like my own company.
UNFILTERED
What exactly feels fake about modern relationships to you?
POLINA
Probably how performative they became. Posting everything on social media, making your relationship into some kind of public project. And especially when people have arguments and then suddenly go on Reddit asking, “Am I wrong for asking her to pay 50/50?” I mean… if you have to ask strangers online, maybe something is already wrong.
UNFILTERED
Do you think people actually fall in love, or do they just become attached to an idea?
POLINA
I think it really depends on the person. Some people genuinely fall in love, and others just go from one relationship to another and build their whole life around that.
I had an old school friend like this. She was really outgoing and social, and then she got a boyfriend and suddenly stopped talking to us completely. No texts, no going out anymore. At first we thought maybe he was abusive or controlling, but after trying to talk to her many times we realized it wasn’t even about him. It was just her model of relationships — like once she has a boyfriend, everything else disappears. I mean, it’s her choice of course, but I don’t really get it.
When people hear “I don’t want sex,” they immediately assume something is wrong. Why do you think people struggle to accept disinterest?
Because people think everyone should want the same things. If you don’t want relationships or sex, suddenly they think something traumatic happened to you or that you just “haven’t met the right person.” Maybe nothing happened. Maybe some people are just different.
UNFILTERED
Do you think sex is overvalued culturally?
POLINA
A little bit, yes. It’s everywhere — movies, music, social media — like it’s supposed to be the center of life. And if you don’t care about it that much, people act like you’re missing out on something huge. But honestly, I think people should just stop assuming everyone experiences intimacy in the same way.
UNFILTERED
What’s the difference between loneliness and choosing yourself?
POLINA
Loneliness feels empty. Choosing yourself feels peaceful. I think people confuse the two because they’re scared of being alone.
UNFILTERED
What do you think you gain from “me + me” that relationships can’t offer?
POLINA
Freedom maybe. Peace. Space to think about myself without constantly compromising or checking in with someone. I like being able to decide things without considering another person all the time.
UNFILTERED
Has anyone ever made you reconsider your whole philosophy?
POLINA
Not really.
Maybe I could change my mind if I met someone who genuinely made sense to me, but I’m not interested in forcing something just for the sake of having a relationship.
UNFILTERED
What would someone have to be like for you to think: okay, maybe?
POLINA
They would have to feel easy. No pressure, no weird expectations, no trying to fit me into some role. Someone who actually adds something to my life instead of becoming my whole life.
UNFILTERED
What do people misunderstand most about choosing yourself?
POLINA
That it’s sad. People assume being alone automatically means you’re lonely or miserable. Sometimes it’s literally the opposite.
UNFILTERED
Do you think this is forever, or are you open to being proven wrong?
POLINA
Probably not. I’m not against love. I’m against settling, forcing things, or pretending to want something just because everyone else does.
UNFILTERED
In one sentence: why me + me?
POLINA
Because I’d rather genuinely enjoy my own life than chase something just because I’m expected to
